Monday, January 05, 2004
Now that things have settled back down
Now that things have settled back down
I can get back to my neglected diary. It’s hard to write about everything that has transpired over the last 3 weeks, so obviously what gets written is what meant most to me as of this writing. Or at least stuck out in my mind for whatever reason. Maybe in the future I’ll remember something else. Or misremember it. Fiction can become fact if we forget what really happened!
First off, by going back home, I got to see people I haven’t seen in a while. Or more to the point, people who hadn’t seen me in a while got to see me. This lead to the phenomenon of people commenting on how great I look. While I received that comment many times in my thin days, it’s not something I heard a lot of after I got fat. But now that I’m losing weight, people feel obliged to comment on it.
And, I’m almost ashamed of it, but I like that! I like that people are noticing, and commenting on my accomplishment. It has been quite an effort to lose weight when I’ve obviously living a lifestyle of temptation. I don’t like that the comments indicate that they think I look better: I don’t think I look better. But I’m like anyone else, I can’t help but love the attention and comments!
Even the people who have seen me since I’ve lost weight, they notice the drop too. Of course, standing next to Ian, with his weight gain, creates a contrast.
The best reactions are from family who I haven’t seen in a whole year. Last Christmas I was 460 pounds, Ian was a ‘mere’ 440. I was considerably wider than he was. Now at 340 and 470 respectively, I can vanish into his shadow.
It was great seeing all my friends again, but the best was getting to see Jeri and Amanda again. I miss them so much, I still remember living with them, changing Amanda’s diapers, being up with her at night. I’m so ready to have my own kids, it almost hurts.
Jeri and James are getting married in June, and I get to be the maid of honour! I’ve never gotten to be in the bridal party, so this is pretty cool stuff. (Also note: so as not to infringe on their wedding, we’re thinking of getting married in the fall.)
For Christmas Ian got me diamond earrings, and then for my birthday he got me the matching pendant. He says it’s not fair to have my birthday and Christmas so close, it makes it harder to spoil me. I just tell him that he’s going to have to get creative.
I got him a new leather jacket. I have no idea how many cows had to die for it, but it looks fantastic on him! It’s even got room for him to grow into it, but it doesn’t LOOK like it, which is important.
New Years was a lot of fun. Another party at James’s Dad’s condo. That, of course, is where Ian and met, so it’s always special for us. One minor issue, Ian wanted to weigh in at midnight, but since our scale was 2 hours away, this didn’t happen. In fact, I’ve convinced him to wait until Wednesday, as per usual, so we have some more anticipation to look forward to.
I was going to write about reflections on the past year. Certainly a lot has happened, but I think that’s worthy of another full journal entry!
Happy 2004
I can get back to my neglected diary. It’s hard to write about everything that has transpired over the last 3 weeks, so obviously what gets written is what meant most to me as of this writing. Or at least stuck out in my mind for whatever reason. Maybe in the future I’ll remember something else. Or misremember it. Fiction can become fact if we forget what really happened!
First off, by going back home, I got to see people I haven’t seen in a while. Or more to the point, people who hadn’t seen me in a while got to see me. This lead to the phenomenon of people commenting on how great I look. While I received that comment many times in my thin days, it’s not something I heard a lot of after I got fat. But now that I’m losing weight, people feel obliged to comment on it.
And, I’m almost ashamed of it, but I like that! I like that people are noticing, and commenting on my accomplishment. It has been quite an effort to lose weight when I’ve obviously living a lifestyle of temptation. I don’t like that the comments indicate that they think I look better: I don’t think I look better. But I’m like anyone else, I can’t help but love the attention and comments!
Even the people who have seen me since I’ve lost weight, they notice the drop too. Of course, standing next to Ian, with his weight gain, creates a contrast.
The best reactions are from family who I haven’t seen in a whole year. Last Christmas I was 460 pounds, Ian was a ‘mere’ 440. I was considerably wider than he was. Now at 340 and 470 respectively, I can vanish into his shadow.
It was great seeing all my friends again, but the best was getting to see Jeri and Amanda again. I miss them so much, I still remember living with them, changing Amanda’s diapers, being up with her at night. I’m so ready to have my own kids, it almost hurts.
Jeri and James are getting married in June, and I get to be the maid of honour! I’ve never gotten to be in the bridal party, so this is pretty cool stuff. (Also note: so as not to infringe on their wedding, we’re thinking of getting married in the fall.)
For Christmas Ian got me diamond earrings, and then for my birthday he got me the matching pendant. He says it’s not fair to have my birthday and Christmas so close, it makes it harder to spoil me. I just tell him that he’s going to have to get creative.
I got him a new leather jacket. I have no idea how many cows had to die for it, but it looks fantastic on him! It’s even got room for him to grow into it, but it doesn’t LOOK like it, which is important.
New Years was a lot of fun. Another party at James’s Dad’s condo. That, of course, is where Ian and met, so it’s always special for us. One minor issue, Ian wanted to weigh in at midnight, but since our scale was 2 hours away, this didn’t happen. In fact, I’ve convinced him to wait until Wednesday, as per usual, so we have some more anticipation to look forward to.
I was going to write about reflections on the past year. Certainly a lot has happened, but I think that’s worthy of another full journal entry!
Happy 2004
// posted by Charlotte @ 11:24:00 AM 
