Monday, June 19, 2006
Roll Reversal
The only reason I’m not ‘officially’ gaining these days it because, well, I don’t know what form to fill out to make it official. I’ve seen the ‘Feedee Pledge’ floating around, I suppose I could fill that in, but that doesn’t seem like my style. I could come up with the Gainiac Club I’d intended. That could make things official too.
As I was saying, now that I’m actively gaining weight, and Ian is actively losing weight, we’ve slipped into a natural role reversal: Ian’s begun feeding me again! Oh, I’m still handling the cooking duties in the kitchen, but when it comes to snack time, Ian has been doing his best to ensure I’ve got a bottomless bowl of chips/ice cream/whatever I’m eating. He’s treating me like a spoiled princess again and I LOVE IT!
Saturday night was a perfect example. Amy came over to watch the hockey game with us, and rather than me keeping them happy and fed, Ian was scurrying around (well, he’s still far too fat to scurry, but there isn’t really a word for what Ian was doing. Ambling? Lumbering?) making sure that Amy and I had plenty to eat for the evening.
Speaking of Amy, and role reversal, I’m not feeling so tiny next to her any more. She’s still got 40 or 50 pounds on me, but with my own expansion, I don’t think the difference between us is such a big one. I’ve been getting her ‘hand me down’ clothes, and already we’re wearing the same top size. It’s just that huge ass of hers that’s making her bigger than me.
She is bigger than ever of course. She’s over 460 pounds now, and the weight really is catching up with her. I feel awkward just watching her waddle across the room! Her appetite keeps growing to match her though. She barely seemed to let up at the game at all. I know she’s always eaten lots, maybe it just seems like more since I’m eating along with her now!
It reminds me when she was first gaining, because I was losing weight then, and I really wanted to let go with her, to let her know that it’s something we could do together, something fun. Now we FINALLY get to do it. It really is a small, unfulfilled goal I didn’t even realise that I had.
As I was saying, now that I’m actively gaining weight, and Ian is actively losing weight, we’ve slipped into a natural role reversal: Ian’s begun feeding me again! Oh, I’m still handling the cooking duties in the kitchen, but when it comes to snack time, Ian has been doing his best to ensure I’ve got a bottomless bowl of chips/ice cream/whatever I’m eating. He’s treating me like a spoiled princess again and I LOVE IT!
Saturday night was a perfect example. Amy came over to watch the hockey game with us, and rather than me keeping them happy and fed, Ian was scurrying around (well, he’s still far too fat to scurry, but there isn’t really a word for what Ian was doing. Ambling? Lumbering?) making sure that Amy and I had plenty to eat for the evening.
Speaking of Amy, and role reversal, I’m not feeling so tiny next to her any more. She’s still got 40 or 50 pounds on me, but with my own expansion, I don’t think the difference between us is such a big one. I’ve been getting her ‘hand me down’ clothes, and already we’re wearing the same top size. It’s just that huge ass of hers that’s making her bigger than me.
She is bigger than ever of course. She’s over 460 pounds now, and the weight really is catching up with her. I feel awkward just watching her waddle across the room! Her appetite keeps growing to match her though. She barely seemed to let up at the game at all. I know she’s always eaten lots, maybe it just seems like more since I’m eating along with her now!
It reminds me when she was first gaining, because I was losing weight then, and I really wanted to let go with her, to let her know that it’s something we could do together, something fun. Now we FINALLY get to do it. It really is a small, unfulfilled goal I didn’t even realise that I had.
Friday, June 16, 2006
416
When I started blogging, I sort of regretted not tracking my weight gain. Now I've done it again! I'm 416+ pounds, and I hardly write about my own weight gains! I write about Ian's gains and loss, I write about what that means to me, what it means to us, and how our lives have changed. But I haven't focused on my own weight gain.
Part of it has to do with Ian, of course. Even though I've gotten quite large again, I'm still much smaller than he is. I've just been more fascinated with his fat than my own. There are other factors at work, I certainly have been enjoying my weight gain, but never quite seem to find the time and energy to actually write about it. I know I could make the time, but, lets be honest, this isn't exactly a high priority for me.
So what have I missed?
My appetite is really taking over. Ian's gotten control over his, so I don't watch mine, at all. In fact, now that he's getting around better, he's starting to spoil me like in the old days. I know it's a role reversal, and we're both loving it. There's no limit to what I can eat except for practical limits on my time. If I had the chance, I'd be gaining twice as fast.
And what's changed?
My weight is different this time. My belly is filling in from when it was stretched out when I was preggo. I look more preggo now than the last time I was this fat. I feel it too. My body never quite recovered, so I could easily pass for preggo now. Also, my tits are bigger. That's partly because I'm still breastfeeding. I know I should be weaning Paul, but I really really like it. I'm not as fond of the huge tits as I'd have thought, but sometimes they are quite fun.
I've managed to avoid back and joint pain this time around, though I don't think I had much when I was 'merely' 416 pounds last time. Being aware of it, avoiding things that might hurt make it easier I think. At the same time, I'm far more awkward than last time. My weight is different, my joints are still out of place from being preggo, so getting up, getting around are more of an adventure than even being 460 was.
Part of it has to do with Ian, of course. Even though I've gotten quite large again, I'm still much smaller than he is. I've just been more fascinated with his fat than my own. There are other factors at work, I certainly have been enjoying my weight gain, but never quite seem to find the time and energy to actually write about it. I know I could make the time, but, lets be honest, this isn't exactly a high priority for me.
So what have I missed?
My appetite is really taking over. Ian's gotten control over his, so I don't watch mine, at all. In fact, now that he's getting around better, he's starting to spoil me like in the old days. I know it's a role reversal, and we're both loving it. There's no limit to what I can eat except for practical limits on my time. If I had the chance, I'd be gaining twice as fast.
And what's changed?
My weight is different this time. My belly is filling in from when it was stretched out when I was preggo. I look more preggo now than the last time I was this fat. I feel it too. My body never quite recovered, so I could easily pass for preggo now. Also, my tits are bigger. That's partly because I'm still breastfeeding. I know I should be weaning Paul, but I really really like it. I'm not as fond of the huge tits as I'd have thought, but sometimes they are quite fun.
I've managed to avoid back and joint pain this time around, though I don't think I had much when I was 'merely' 416 pounds last time. Being aware of it, avoiding things that might hurt make it easier I think. At the same time, I'm far more awkward than last time. My weight is different, my joints are still out of place from being preggo, so getting up, getting around are more of an adventure than even being 460 was.
