MsCezanne's Odyssey

When I started blogging, I sort of regretted not tracking my weight gain. Now I've done it again! I'm 416+ pounds, and I hardly write about my own weight gains! I write about Ian's gains and loss, I write about what that means to me, what it means to us, and how our lives have changed. But I haven't focused on my own weight gain.

Part of it has to do with Ian, of course. Even though I've gotten quite large again, I'm still much smaller than he is. I've just been more fascinated with his fat than my own. There are other factors at work, I certainly have been enjoying my weight gain, but never quite seem to find the time and energy to actually write about it. I know I could make the time, but, lets be honest, this isn't exactly a high priority for me.

So what have I missed?

My appetite is really taking over. Ian's gotten control over his, so I don't watch mine, at all. In fact, now that he's getting around better, he's starting to spoil me like in the old days. I know it's a role reversal, and we're both loving it. There's no limit to what I can eat except for practical limits on my time. If I had the chance, I'd be gaining twice as fast.

And what's changed?

My weight is different this time. My belly is filling in from when it was stretched out when I was preggo. I look more preggo now than the last time I was this fat. I feel it too. My body never quite recovered, so I could easily pass for preggo now. Also, my tits are bigger. That's partly because I'm still breastfeeding. I know I should be weaning Paul, but I really really like it. I'm not as fond of the huge tits as I'd have thought, but sometimes they are quite fun.

I've managed to avoid back and joint pain this time around, though I don't think I had much when I was 'merely' 416 pounds last time. Being aware of it, avoiding things that might hurt make it easier I think. At the same time, I'm far more awkward than last time. My weight is different, my joints are still out of place from being preggo, so getting up, getting around are more of an adventure than even being 460 was.