MsCezanne's Odyssey

Okay, I'll admit I'm having fun. Huge is right, I'm being a provacetreuse. I enjoy it. It's just fun to see people react. I probably love Kate; I love people who disagree with me, but are willing to explore that disagreement. In fact, Kate and I probably agree on far more things than we disagree about, and, probably, we actually agree on some things we wouldn't care to admit. I put words in her mouth because, well, it's fun. It's how I debate, it's how I get someone to clarify themselves. I know Kate doesn't hate fat people, but if I paint her that way, then she very bravely steps up to clarify... my lie leads to the truth. I know a lot of people don't like that, but it's a good way to get rid of people I genuinely hate too.

Huge, I'm certainly not trying to co-opt your own thoughts on labelling. Just writing as it comes, I'm glad you pointed it out. My thoughts are not as unique as I'd like, and basically my point was that the labels vary from person to person. It's not just the 'fat' labels either, pretty much anything means something different to everyone. BBW and SSBBW just happen to be relatively rare terms. Don't for a second consider this journalism. That implies research, balance, and all kinds of other things that I'm not going to do. At most, consider it editorialising.

Bob, you're free to take offence from Kate. I know she didn't mean it, but at the same time, a lot of people cause offence without meaning to. Some people are overly sensitive. Some people are insensitive. Most people are just honest, and are willing to open their eyes to new experiences, and are willing to step in the proverbial shit, as often happens when dealing with something new. Whatever anyone here thinks of Kate, I can't help but admire that she's been sticking around.

Kate, I can't help but admire that you're sticking around. I said it before, I'll say it again, you're my foil, you've really invigorated me, and give me a chance to paint you as the bad guy. I do it because I know you can handle it, and because I know that every exaggeration I put out there draws a little more thought, a little more truth. I don't understand life, or even myself, any better than you do. The discussion is therapeutic for me, and I can't thank you enough for that. And you're right, aside from work and parenting, there is little in my life besides food at the moment. I am working towards the end of that, it hasn't always been this way, and it won't be this way forever. I'm enjoying it now, and I'll miss it when it's over, but I'm also ready for other things. The weather is cooperating though! I'm too big to go on long walks, but the weather has been anything but appropriate for long walks, so I don't have a chance to miss those, lol.

As for me, Easter has helped me put on a few more pounds, and kept Ian to losing only a single pound. I'm up to 493 and Ian's down to 467. I haven't heard from Amy in a little bit. I'm sure she's still fat, and probably fatter, but I have nothing to report.

As for my weight goals, 500 is pretty much set in stone. There is no doubt in my mind that I'd like to gain more, perhaps reaching Ian's BMI record, or even shooting for Amy's. But there are other things in life that I want, and it so happens these goals are exclusive with my size, and if I have to choose, it's the other goals. Life is compromise, I'm just picking the path with the greatest rewards, and I'm doing it happily.

// posted by Charlotte @ 11:41:00 AM